Thursday, May 22, 2008

Whiskey and Cigarettes

Sometimes when I take a pill (Tylenol, allergy medicine, etc.), I pretend whatever I am drinking it with is alcohol. When I swallow it, I close my eyes and act like it’s so good…just like in the movies.

I have never smoked a cigarette in my life…not even a puff. I have never even put a cigarette in my mouth jokingly. Personally, I find it trashy. Both of my parents have smoked in the past (my mom still does), and I just feel that it is disgusting. When I see girls do it outside of bars I don’t even want to look at them anymore. I know a lot of them think that its either helping them lose weight, or keeping them slim, but its not. A lot of my friends (who do not smoke), ask people for cigarettes when they are at a party or outside of a bar, and I have no idea why. They stand in the cold and puff on a cigarette as if it is cool, but it really isn’t. What classy girl would look at them and think, “Wow! Those guys out there smoking are really cool!” None would. The only girls that might find it attractive are the ones that are out there doing it themselves…and most of the times those girls are trashy. Stop smoking. Go get a college degree instead of waiting tables, snorting coke, and spending half of the $84 you made that night at another bar down the street that same night. Oh also, if you’re a server and then go out and complain about how bad servers at other restaurants are, it doesn’t make you a good server…it makes you annoying.

This was not intended to offend anyone. This was intended to let you know how I feel. If you feel that you fall into this category, I do not want you to come to me with excuses as to why you are this way. I would rather you take this opportunity to better yourself and not worry about what I think. I’m so controversial.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Words

I hate when people say/write the following words/terms and I don’t really have a good reason for feeling that way. I just find them stupid, and since I am always right, they are.

Douchebaggery

Debauchery

Chicanery

Shit show

Girlies

Chillaxin

I am away from my computer

Bro

Moco

Fry (“Ohhh you got fried”)

From this point on if you use them, you’re admitting you’re gay.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Prostitution and Goldfish

By now most have you have heard that District Heights mayor James Walla Jr. has been charged with soliciting a prostitute. I don’t think soliciting a prostitute should be illegal. I feel it’s kind of like buying stolen merchandise from the street. You know it’s wrong and you shouldn’t do it, but it’s already been stolen and you’re just the one buying it. It was the thiefs decision to steal the merchandise and if you weren’t going to buy it…someone else was. What sucks about this guy is that he was caught trying to pick up a MALE prostitute. Not even a tranny…a straight up dude. Try explaining that one my man.

The next pet I get (probably a gold fish from the fair), I am going to name Goldberg. One would think that I am naming it after the famous wrestler with the same name, but I am not. I’d be naming it after the famous Mighty Ducks goalie. If it does turn out to be a goldfish the name would be even more fitting cause of the whole gold theme.

Oh also, I would like to add that I would never endorse or condone prostitution. I just don't think it should be illegal. You know...kind of how abortion is RIGHTFULLY legal. HAHAHA eat that pro-lifers!